Wednesday, November 30, 2011

The mind atrophy that is California Dreaming

I am still in California, and my quickness of mind with each passing day is decaying exponentially. It is liberating, expected, but still unnerving.

I feel so much mind-lapsing, my brain constantly struggles to find the words, the right thoughts, the right way to quantify life... like I exist in a vacuum of the tip-of-the-tongue phenomenon.

Let me offer this musical explanation:




California Dreaming: I guess it's a fine quandary in which to find oneself, especially if you're able-minded enough to identify it? :)

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

I'm thankful for Great Britain ... wait...

I am on the verge of tears from the nostalgic connection that listening to The Beatles associates with home.

I know, how sort-of un-American of me on this eve of Thanks. 

But yes, even though they stand in somewhat of a retort to what the holiday stands for, I am thankful for these Brits (and yes you can mock my Kate Middleton Cambridge adoration as well) that aid in punctuating these lovely feelings.

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Live from New York, it's Saturday night!

Is it so lame that sometimes all I want to do weekend nights is hibernate?

Namely, crawl in my bed, read books, stuff my friends share on Google +, and troll through Good Reads?

I must be too old for these young whippersnappers nowadays. ;)

Friday, November 18, 2011

Guess what's back?!

After a painfully long hiatus, Kate Middleton For The Win is back! I literally squealed when it popped up on my Reader. I'm a winner, I know. But what woman wouldn't want to birth meaningless figureheads as her job? Right!

As one of my friends aptly put it, "I hope it's 'Kate Middleton's Baby For The Win' soon."



Also, thanks to Biggins, behold the following trifecta of AWESOME: a Stereotype Map, made by a Masshole, about Mass.


Thursday, November 17, 2011

Baby steps to the bigger picture

A deep thought from November 2011. I was really into saving the world but overwhelmed with how to start.


When people earnestly ask me what I really want to do with my life, it's to somehow get involved in combatting human trafficking.

I'm not sure what way it will manifest itself, as I currently feel ill-equipped to take on such a monumental task. I guess education is the first step. Reading news in hopes a eureka moment will come at some point.

I appreciate that so many apply the word "abolitionism" to this global problem ... I think it connotes something greater than sex slave, and maybe will cause more to feel compelled and horrified.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Writing woes

I am guilty of various grammatical errors, but the singular rule that consistently makes me double-check myself is the difference between 'it's' and 'its'. 

I'm always inclined to use "it's" as a possessive pronoun and have to remind myself that no, it solely signifies a contraction. i.e. "It's walls are covered with paint" seems like the most normal usage to me! Gah!

I know! I know! This seems an elementary problem, especially when you consider that their/there/they're is a non-issue for me most of the time and I (usually) don't have trouble with other contractions!

This whole handicap reminds me of the days when, long after I could proficiently read and write, my littlest sister was learning how with phonics-oriented curriculum (as I did not). I remember looking over her homework, and questioning my own fluency. After concluding that yes, I could still hablo ingles, I decided that it was a very inadvertent way to acquire literacy.

Silly grammar. I tip my hat to anyone learning English. It is a language that often intimidates me, even though it's (got it!) my first.

What are your grammar hang-ups?

Monday, November 14, 2011

Musings on vanity

From November 2011. My attitudes remain the same.


It's a little scary how happy makeup makes me. It is not born of deep-seated shame in how I look without it, I simply love the proces: the application, the artistry, the techniques you learn, the end result, and even the packaging.

For some girls, it's shoes. For me, it's cosmetics.

I've even started watching YouTube tutorials, inspired by my sister who watches tutorials on nail art, knitting, and hair techniques.

BUT DO NOT, I mean DO NOT, youtube things about skin acne problems. Take it from me, they cannot be unseen!! ;)

To live is to leave

Airplanes are an interesting situation. Beyond the uncomfortable being sardines with strangers bit, it is a time when I am easily distracted (I realize said variables are not mutually exclusive). Books only go a chapter or two before I get sleepy. Oh, maybe I'll sleep for the duration! I always hope falsely, trying not to let my internal dialogue jinx myself. And, 45 minutes later, I'm awake, walking the aisles. I try to milk being vertical for all it's worth and hang out by the bathrooms until some bully crew member tells me they 'need the area clear'. Why can't I just chill by the door and look morbidly at the emergency exit handle (you know you've played the mental what-if game, too)? I have always been too afraid to ask. Then I return to my seat, and sit blank-faced as I decide whether to drown out the droning plane engine noise with music or read or try to conjure exhaustion. And so the cycle of distraction repeats itself.

My latest flights took me to Utah, a place I swore up and down I would never return. Originally booked for a wedding, I re-routed my whirlwind on-the-ground plans to see a bunch of friends instead. It was maybe the most relaxed I've ever been on a trip in my life, for various reasons. I concluded that Utah is far more interesting than I ever gave credit, but equally so, I know why I was itching to leave and still don't believe I could live again.


Lately, New York has been nothing but hassles coupled with a newly learned sense of chlaustrophobia (disappointing), so anywhere without a good public transportation system would have sufficed (Sorry Boston, 3 weeks ago, I'm looking at you and your T). Lucky for Utah this time, I had a wonderful time seeing so many dear friends in different phases of life than when we last parted ways.

And it was on the airplane, high in the sky, where I cemented my feelings for how much they mean to me. And how at peace I am with my life, in all its competing struggles and triumphs. And how free and liberated I am at this moment to potentially go somewhere new, or stay with a renewed perspective on how to live here in the city, starting with this guidance I've heard tossed around for a while: "To live in New York is to leave it."

Needless to say, I'm a believer now.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

ABOUT that whole hipsterdom bit

If you haven't seen it by now, NYT ran this lame ass piece about mormons being 'hipster'. I think Brigham, a cool dude in my ward, has the best written insight into it all. At church, there were some funny comments made in passing. As you may gather, its really fun going to church during this time of heightened interest in our community, as everyone is especially news-astute and lessons and talks always have topical spin. I like. Also like? This tumblr: Halloween or Williamsburg

Don't read this if you have a soul

"Get Off My Internets" is my new favorite blog of a month or two, thanks to Tara.

Maybe it's because I've always had a keen sense of spelling (read: neurotic issues) but "atilier fashuns" makes me laugh out loud.

So, we can conclude I am a darkened soul, as you probably think it's all really mean.

Retain that naivete for the both of us, please! ;)


Updates from the city:
I think I've finally zero'ed in on where Anna Wintour lives. From pause/playing the part in the September Issue a few times, and the fact that I walk by it every time on the way to yoga.
Oh wait, now I feel really dumb because I just googled it and realized I could have had the answer a month sooner. But I feel kind of superior for figuring something out without Google, for once. Haha.
I had a dream that Andre Leon Talley lived across the street from me last night, and we hung out. Weird.

FALL (aka Claritin and Sudafed season) is here!!! Yipee!!!!! I have also started to shun gluten products, as they congest me, so hip hip hooray for no bagels or pizza!

Twitter might as well be a significant other of mine. I love that I can read news headlines and jokes at my beckoned call waiting for a friend and needing to look "cool/busy" on my phone ... or like tonight, as I sat in Washington Square Park and checked it as I listened to an impromptu gospel choir and bums picking at the trash around me. Delightful.
I'm @ZandraLane, if you wanna follow.

LSU is really fun to watch, because they win. The 'bama game last weekend was a nail biter! Related: How adorable is this "I am a Mormon" knockoff of USC quarterback Matt Barkley?

Thursday, November 3, 2011

The only one?

Am I the only one that finds this video distressing?? Little kids crying is the most upsetting sound in the world; why would anyone preempt it? Well, I guess Kimmel didn't expect there to be so much crying... Ah well.



Rest assured, I do have a sense of humor (?), the red pajama'ed one at the end made me keel over. "Oh wow, good for you..." HAHAHA